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iceman

Titanium

I love this new song. I'm trying to figure out how I can live these words in the real life. It seems easier to be depressed, negative, not carrying, selfish, self absorb in my own depression of thoughts. It's always seems harder to be positive, uplifting and a Polly Anna like I'm normally am. It seems I'm losing hope in humanity, family and lack of support from others. I'm not this person that feels sorry for myself, depressed, easy to anger, easily frustrated, easy to anger over other people's actions, negative, wild thoughts that creep in my mind, thoughts of wondering what has happened to me over the last year. I know I am not the only one facing these issues. It has never taken me this long to find a job. Sure, a job doesn't identify who I am but it will loosen the rope around Ray's neck if I could just find some way to pitch in financially. Then I get someone to tell Ray that they think something is wrong with us. That they were concern that I could be up to no good and stepping out on him while he is hard at work. I don't hate nor am I mad at this person. This person just doesn't understand my personal stress that I am dealing with along with worrying about Ray. One person trying to keep it together for two is hard work. What makes it worth it in the end? Well, that is easy... LOVE! I have said it numerous times that I love Ray with all my heart and soul. Though I'm afraid that my own personal fights, demons and stress is taking it's toll and I'm falling apart mentally in ways I didn't think I was that weak in. Yes, I see it as a sign of weakness that I'm allowing these stressing issues bring me down. I use to be stronger, full of courage, confident and feel 6 foot tall. Despite the fact that in real life I am only 5'4... LOL

How do I get my gusto and the old frankie back? I don't know if I can. I don't know if that is necessarily a bad thing but whatever is going on I hope it makes me into an even better human being then before. Besides, isn't that what we all are suppose to strive for in this crazy world that we call home?


David Guetta - Titanium (f. Sia)

You shout it loud, but I can't hear a word you say
I'm talking loud, not saying much
I'm criticized, but all your bullets ricochet
you shoot me down, but I get up

I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose
fire away, fire away
ricochet, you take your aim
fire away, fire away
you shoot me down, but I won't fall
I am titanium
you shoot me down, but I won't fall
I am titanium

Cut me down, but it's you who'll have further to fall
Ghost town and haunted love
Raise your voice, sticks and stones may break my bones
I'm talking loud, not saying much

I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose
fire away, fire away
ricochet, you take your aim
fire away, fire away
you shoot me down, but I won't fall
I am titanium
you shoot me down, but I won't fall
I am titanium
I am titanium
I am titanium


Stone hard, machine gun
Fired at the ones who run
Stone hard, as bulletproof glass

You shoot me down, but I won't fall
I am titanium
You shoot me down, but I won't fall
I am titanium
You shoot me down, but I won't fall
I am titanium
You shoot me down, but I won't fall
I am titanium
I am titanium

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iceman

October 2012

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