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"Shit out of luck"

I'm going to legally change my name to "Shit out of luck" can things get any worse?

Well I was hoping this post would had been better news. My back is against the wall and it's about to break under the weight. Ray and I just moved in with a good friend of his to save us some money and help out a friend. So I traded four new walls caving in on me for another. I have been trying for a year to get back to work. I have applied to temp agencies that are a joke and playing games to McDonald's, Wendy's, John Hopkins, Dollar General, Wegman's Grocery and Goodwill for God's sake. Neither of these places are interested in hiring me. Either I'm over qualified or they don't want to take a chance in hiring me or whatever lame excuse they want to give.

All I want to do is work. I want a job to put food on our table and pay bills and help Ray out 'cause he can't do it on his own and neither do I expect him to. I am so tired of people accusing me of him being my sugar daddy also. You don't know me or us to make that assumption. So back the fuck off! I have never had any problems with working. I sure don't want any man taking care of me! If I can't get it on my own I don't want it!

I am so depressed and defeated. I don't know what to do. I spend all the time that Ray is at work looking for a job. 8 Hours a day, 5 days a week, 40 hours a week and nothing comes of it. They say the economy is getting better and they are adding jobs. Really? Where the fuck is my job at?

I am at my wits end. All I want to do is get a job to help Ray and I out. I love this man more then anyone will know and I feel completely worthless and helpless. I feel like such a failure and a loser that I don't know what to do. I try to stay positive but it's wearing thin. I mentally can't do this anymore. I need a job like yesterday. I just feel like sometimes he is better off without me :(



There's nothing I can say or do to help out with what you need -- a job. Sorry. But I'm out here listening and sorrowing, sorrowing with you.
:) thank you for the needed support and thoughts. I am trying to hang in there.

October 2012

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