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Learning curve

      Today was a good day overall. I registered to go back to College this spring and today was my first class. I hadn't been in a college class since 1997.... yeah I'm old...LOL So it's going to be a "Learning Curve" to get comfortable being back in School but at the same time I'm so excited and can't wait to learn. I just love the idea being back in a class setting. My ultimate goal is to get my AA in either Business Administrative or Legal assistant. I have a month or two to make up my mind which way to go. Though Ray knows some contacts if I decide to do the Legal assistant to help get me a good job once I am done. I think that I'm leaning more in the way of Legal assistant. I really enjoy legal lingo and anything that has to do with law.

     Another "Learning Curve" is helping Ray to see how amazing he is. With the past hurts in the last 5 1/2 years I think I would respond to people the same way that he has or does whichever the case may be. I don't want to be pushy with him or get on his nervous at all. I so want him to know that I so want him to be restored from those hurts and that it is ok to let me in to love on him, encourage him, take compliments from me when I express them to him. I think he is amazing, smart, caring and sexy as hell to me. I have told Ray he needs to smile more because I love his smile. I know it's hard for him to do these things because of the past hurts from his ex. I have told him and still want him to know that I'm here to repair that for him. I know I can't repair all the hurts but the ones that I can I'm going to do the best within my power to help him. I told him today that I have noticed at times he puts himself down from time to time about the way he looks and not responding to my compliments. As far as my compliments are concerned I don't need to hear him respond to my compliments for the sake of doing so. My approach is to let him see that he is better then the crap he came out of with the ex. I really think it would help him in the long run for himself. I don't want him to do it for me but to do it for himself so he can feel better about himself. 

   As far as the way he looks I told him I have notice how he puts himself down. I told him that he is wonderfully and beautifully made in my eyes. I told him that if I hear him speak negative about the way he looks that I'm going to cut him off and say "Don't do that" my reasoning behind this is simple. I want to give him back his self esteem. I also want to let him know again that I think the way that he looks is totally sexy to me and he has seen my body respond to him nicely so I don't think like he does about the way he looks. At the same time I don't want this to get on his nerves or piss him off. That is the last thing that I want to do. I just can't make it anymore clear that I want him to see his own worth. I'm also not afraid if he accomplish these things and looks even hotter then he does now that he would trade me in for a younger model...LOL I truly believe he loves me as much as I love him so I have no fears about that.

   So this ends this post I hope Ray and whoever reads this post can see my true heart's desire for Ray. Thanks for reading and have a good night!!!



October 2012

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